What is your relationship with divine? This is one of Julia Cameron’s questions from week 11 of the Artist’s Way, and I’m going to open up this question with a quote I recently read:

“To write authentically is to write from a common source, a common centre. [This centre is the heart]. The heart’s location below our brain and in our torso can keep our awareness in our core, the Latin word for heart, from which we get courage. From that centre, common to all of us, spirit and body and language aline. When you write from the centre, you write what your spirit, body, and language demand you write. It’s a potentially hazardous and dangerous path because your protective ego may no longer be in as much control, and this writing can shake you out of your comfortable habits by forcing you to write the truth – regardless of genre. With persistence, though, you learn you can persevere, that you can write no other way… To make love to the darkness [a quote taken from Margaret Atwood] a writer moves toward doubts and doesn’t try to repress them or let them control her. Such a writer finds ways to spelunker [I love this word] into the body’s and the imagination’s subtle caverns and find hideous yet exquisite forms and names of oneself, of humanity, of God, and of whatever it is we call reality – the basic stuff of authentic writing”

– Jeff Davis (The Journey from the Center to the Page: Yoga Philosophies and Practices as Muse for Authentic Writing)

By the way, Spelunker means “one who makes a hobby of exploring and studying caves.” This is maybe my new favourite word. I love the idea of thinking of yourself as a cave waiting to be explored.

Why do I love this metaphor?

Most caves are not man made. They are discovered, and their existence is both mysterious and frightening. Exploring a cave demands a special kind of bravery. Exploration works best with a mixture of spontaneity and curiousity. Who am I? What do I believe? Because of erosion and other factors, a cave is also constantly changing – just like you. As an artist (an actor and a writer) it is my duty to explore the cave that is my soul, and to learn everything that I can learn about myself. The best thing about this, is that the learning never stops because I am a constantly evolving being.

I don’t believe in God in the traditional “catholic” sense that I was taught growing up. I don’t believe that God is some sort of mystical man up in the sky smiting and rewarding people according to some man-made rule book. I believe that “God” is energy, and that true creative “genius” occurs when you get out of your head and tap into that energy. When you have the courage to explore the self that is underneath all of the fear, resentment, self-doubt, and pain. When you have the courage to go after your dreams without apology, and without the aid of that oh so familiar self-depractating mumble “I’m a struggling writer/actor/film-maker/dreamer.” When you tap into God, you also tap into your belief in yourself.

I think the greatest thing you can ever do in this life is believe in yourself, explore that cave, and share with the world your unapologetic authentic self. 

Growing up, I was taught that the way into heaven was through lack, and through the disciplined deprivation of life’s pleasures. I now believe that this is a load of bullshit (excuse the language).

As a workaholic it has taken me a long time to clue into this, but the meaning of life is love. Loving yourself, loving others, loving life.

Life is not about waiting for a better time. Life does not happen in retirement. Life happens now.

What is my relationship with the divine? My relationship with divinity is completely synonymous with my relationship with myself. With every passing day, I am learning how to love and appreciate who I am, and to look at my reflection with love. Some days it’s harder than others, but as a friend recently said to me “the time to start believing in yourself is now.” I hope this kick in the butt hits home for you, just as it hit home for me.