What is your favorite way to take a moment for yourself each day?
This was the question that I was asked by Rachael from mala collective. This should be easy, I thought, but then I hesitated. I felt like there was a correct answer, and I knew what that answer should be. As a yogi, I felt like I should be answering with meditation, but that’s not true for me. Although I certainly feel better after meditating (on those days that I actually convince myself to do it), I find the actual process of sitting down and doing nothing excruciating. I do it, because I feel I have something to learn from sitting down with myself, but I don’t consider it enjoyable.
I recently started seeing a counsellor. It’s something that I’ve been putting off for a long time. I can’t believe how much I’m getting out of it. As an actor it’s fascinating to watch her work. She doesn’t just listen to what I say, but she is incredibly perceptive in watching how I say it (what I’m doing with my body, when I laugh, when I mumble, when I trail off, when I divert my gaze). She recently had me do a memory exercise at home that involved writing from the perspective of my 10 year old self (No Problem! I love that stuff). She asked me to tell her about my experience doing the exercise at the beginning of our last session. I told her that I found it surprising to go back and bring up memories that I now understand as flawed. I have since heard perspectives on these same incidents shared by the other parties involved. I felt silly for remembering the past as I did. I thought this realization was incredibly perceptive of me. I was proud of my maturity… but she surprised me in her response.
She told me that my memories were my own. My experiences were my own. And it was okay if they were different from that of other peoples. It was okay to have my own reality. I didn’t have to mould my experience to fit the beliefs and memories of others involved (or even not involved). That was a big breakthrough moment for me.
So, setting aside any expectations for how I should answer this question, what is my favourite way to take a moment for myself each day?
I think there are many ways that I enjoy taking time for myself. Although I certainly thrive on routine, a different, more spontaneous, side of me also thrives on variety. My favourite way to take time for myself is by doing something different and unexpected; something where I’m less sure of what I’m going to do next. I love surprising myself. I love
- browsing through a used bookstore, picking up books, and reading the introductions.
- putting on some upbeat music and dancing around in my living room. I love to dance.
- to walk in nature. When I’m in nature I can forget about time and about responsibility. I don’t do this enough, but I love the feeling of freedom that I only get from being away from my phone and my to-do lists. In nature I can embrace myself and who I am moment-to-moment (and I know how cheesy and yogic that sounds).
- taking a moment to journal. I love to write out my private thoughts. As a blogger, I’ve gotten into the habit of writing for the public. It’s nice to have a space where I can write for myself without fear and without the distracting influence of my censure.
I also love moments of introspection. I love those times where I’m not really doing anything. It’s not meditation, it’s just being with myself. I love
- that first sip of coffee at a coffee shop, before I’ve taken out my work. I love that moment of just sitting by myself and watching the people come in through the door. I love to people watch.
- leaning against the counter with a banana and heaping glob of some sort of nut butter. It’s my favourite snack combination. Usually I have it first thing in the morning.
- that moment after I’ve finished a run and I’m walking home. I love the feeling of being in a body that has just exerted itself past what’s comfortable. I love the feeling of strength and of tired muscles. I love the feeling of my breath reaching deep into my diaphragm.
I feel like there are more ways that I could have answered this question. I feel like I could have been even more candid, but the truth is that I’m still in the process of getting to know myself. I’m 25 years old and I feel like I’m just learning what I actually love to do; how I love to spend my time. And that’s okay. My experience is my own, just like your experience is your own.
How do you take a moment for yourself?
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Mala Collective was started by Matt and Ashley after a trip to Bali and the discovery of the unqiue rudraksha bead jewelry. “The gemstones are believed to hold their own healing qualities, while the rudraksha beads are thought to have the power of healing, and creating peace of mind.” I received the I am adventurous mala bracelet from mala collective. These blog posts are a reflection on my experience wearing them.